You don’t always have to fix it

The smart guy’s guide to dating: a girl’s perspective

Scenario: A girl is crying about something. The guy is awkwardly hovering near her. He asks why she’s crying. She continues crying. He tries to fix the problem. Girl gets mad. Guy gets more confused. She runs off. Doors slam. Everyone is unhappy.

Better scenario: Girl is crying. Guy hugs her. Asks “Can I help in any way?” Girl says no. Guy says “I’m here for you then”. Continues hugging, gives girl tissues and chocolate. Everyone is happier.

When guys are faced with a problem or dealing with issues, they try to fix it. It’s in their DNA to solve a problem by taking action. So that’s why, many times, when girls are crying the guy tries to fix the problem and doesn’t really understand why the girl is just crying about it. That and they don’t like girl tears- that’s also scientifically proven! What guys don’t know is that like 95% of the time the girl doesn’t need/want someone to fix the problem right then. They just need to cry and get their emotions out so that they can deal with the problem themselves later. Honestly, when I and probs like 90% of girls cry, we just want someone to hold us and reassure us that we aren’t alone and that we are cared about. Can you fix the problem that my sister/best friend lives over 1760 miles away? Or that in every movie involving a dog it dies?? (Never watch the movie Hatchi unless you want some serious sobbing-truth). No- you can’t fix these problems. But you can make me feel loved and not lonely just by hugging me and being there for me. Giving me tissues and chocolate is a bonus!! My poor dad has learned this lesson well!

Point is- girls want to know you care about them. While you may be tempted to try to fix the problem we usually just want you to show us you care. You don’t have to say the exact right thing or spend extravagant amounts of money- just be there with us and then make us smile. Pretty simple really!


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